No need to cut off more ears!

I often see Christians more satisfied with proving a point than loving, not saddened at all when the point they have made has hurt or excluded somebody from feeling loved, accepted or valued. We need to aim to make companions, not points.

I have certainly been guilty of fighting for what my pride wants to prove over showing love. Showing the light of Jesus. I have certainly excluded others while trying to defend myself. The aim
should always be to include, unite, redeem and love, as Christ modelled. I don't write this to judge, I want to journey with others honestly, together seek truth. To be disciples of Jesus. If it's possible to do it 100% real! No attempting to earn righteousness through any way other than grace. But trying to walk in step with Jesus through the help of the Holy Spirit. What does it look like?

Sometimes hurt in our lives stops us from being truly able to face the world with out a defensive wall up all around us with moats and dragons and everything we have in our power to keep people from hurting us. This accounts for a majority of peoples attacks on others. Can we see it that way? Feel bad for those who hurt us because they are hurt! We need inner healing so we can view the world with clean lenses. Not tarnished by anger, resentment and pain.

It's not about how you look to the world, It's all about what path you are on. You can be on a path of love or a path of destruction. A path where we walk with others, speak life and healing to others, or the path of destruction where we get so caught up in swinging weapons, we end up taking many innocent people with us as we go.

Good news, regardless of the path, it won't change how much Jesus loves you, how much the church should love you. It just changes how many people you hurt and how often you have to carry a weapon.

We make choices every day that take us more down one path than the other but we can always choose to walk back onto the path of love. This journey isn't about whether we are failing or not. Failing is one of the only guaranties. It's about how we take the journey. How we deal with that failure from In ourselves and when others fail us. Does our value or their value change?

My thought is no. And I think Jesus would agree.

With that said If we as Christians are to represent Jesus, we should be a lot more slow to speak. Check your path position. Am I leading with love or destruction. Am I wielding a sword or stethoscope.

Once we decide to follow Jesus. We aren't speaking on our own anymore. We are speaking with Jesus. We have asked the Holy Spirit to journey with us. Some good advice from james:

James 1:19
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,

We as Christians can be just so darn defensive. Are we sometimes trying to defend Jesus like peter did to the guards who were going to take him away. Jesus had a mission and it was to show gods heart and love to the world. There are battles we must be willing to loose if it means the world sees love. And Jesus himself, knowing full well his innocence and intention to save man, shut his mouth to men while being accused. Why did he do this? It fulfilled prophecy yes, but Jesus didn't just do things to fulfill prophecy, he did things that he knew represented the father. He was so in step with the father.

Sometimes we can show love better by closing our mouths.

In fact I would argue most times we can. Because our tongue is often driven by the fire in our bellies and not the love in our hearts allowed to us by the Holy Spirit though grace and love.

James 3:8
But no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

Turn the other cheek, love your enemies. How can we do this while condemning them?

Jesus was concerned about the individual. He wanted them to know who they were, once a person knows they are loved and saved through grace the desire to judge and harm others grows very dim and the fire that burns bright in us becomes that of sharing the beauty that is unconditional love.

The need to judge others becomes silent when you are filled with the confidence of unconditional love and the desire to share it!

And how can we even begin to take a stance of judgment with someone in the first place, this is so flawed.
Do we think we know their sin?

Sin is clearly not as cut and dry as the word of law or even the writings of Paul  The Pharisees saw it as a sin to work on the sabbath and to uphold that law they would break the law of love. They felt they were in the right to constantly remind people of the law and the fact that they were breaking it. Jesus showed them the way. Even in the old testament God said I require mercy not sacrifice even while the people
Fought every day to uphold the law through sacrifice and ignored gods desire for mercy. But Jesus didn't say exclude the law. The law was there for  "help" and Jesus to remind us of "the heart."

A law with out a heart is not a law of Gods.

Would we bind Jesus by the law? That's what the religious at the time did. Used their laws to kill him. He was spending time with the sinners. In fact saying the kingdom of heaven wouldn't  be accessible to the self righteous.

I simply think it would so benefit the world to have more unconditional love not more people who fight to make a point at the expense of others. Cutting off ears needlessly. This is a journey. Do we fail? Undoubtedly. But we can find love between our failings.

I don't want to hand Jesus a bag of severed ears and expect him to be proud of me. I will just end up making more work for him as he has to then heal those who I have broken just like he did in the bible. I want to be a part of the healing. Let's try to take that journey.

What if Jesus really was about love?

I know there is a lot of Ill will towards Christians. And before I say anything else I would like to state that I understand why. Because the label Christian has been used to judge, hate, and sometimes even kill others. None of those things are okay! They are despicable! For those who label themselves Christian and inflict these things on others, this hate... 

Hypocrite is not nearly a strong enough word for you! 

To quote Jesus, we could call them a "brood of vipers" These people are beyond lost. 

Now I would like to make a really silly analogy. Just to help illustrate the simple foolishness of a hateful Christian. It would be like joining a group called "the giraffe lovers", who's soul purpose was to care for, keep safe and love giraffes, then going out and killing giraffes. Why did you join that group and completely disregard its purpose? Not only is that the opposite of what you should be doing, It would, and should, upset the founders of giraffe lovers to say the least, like throwing mud on all they stand for. Maybe it would be better to look in the mirror, recognize your hate and form another group honest to your hateful desires. Call it what you really are, a giraffe hater! But no, you became a part of this group. Why? 

You are destroying all it stands for! 

This is what the world sees of Giraffe lovers! Their hateful actions will be much louder than those who are out caring for our long neck friends. Firing a gun is always louder than shaking a hand. The world would react defensively for giraffes as they should! But also defensively against a group who just wanted what was best for giraffes and never okayed the actions of these loud jerks! The groups whole purpose would be railroaded! 

Truth can be very easily lost in the noise.

Okay I got carried away with the analogy. My point is. I very much understand the upset towards what the label "Christian" has represented. And I think the label deserves that upset, and I think it should force the church to take a long hard look at what it represents, but I see something amidst the smoke and dust these loud hurtful people have created. 

I truly felt love from reading the gospels, from Jesus.

A very deep knowing, humble, simple, yet profound example of love. I see a beautiful foundation for something that has been completely misrepresented by so many. I want people to be able to see through the loud stuff! To at least get a glimpse of what the intent might have been. For just a moment try to see past the fools going around killing giraffes and consider that maybe they don't represent the core values of that group. Maybe they don't know what the heck they are doing. 

That just maybe, Christianity has been railroaded by "the very loud", who do all the very things that would upset Jesus the most! 

Now I know we could also get into historical debates about who Jesus or yeshua really was. Whether he was more than a man, or whether he existed at all. Those are fair debates and should be allowed to happen. For my purposes though, the idea of Jesus is compelling enough to begin the process of following him/his teaching regardless. Not because I want to Judge or hate or be high and mighty or because I know what it all means or because it's the only way to love. None of that! That actually goes completely against what I believe the message of Jesus is.

I truly want to love the world better, love myself better. I believe the world deserves love, I believe people are beautiful and I want to love more truly, more deeply. I want to treat people

Better, more humbly, less judgementally. 

I believe the most miraculous thing about the story of Jesus is not the healing of sickness or turning water into wine or any of the physical miracles. Even with out those things, the teachings of Jesus would stand out to me because of his wild and unapologetic outlook on loving. He came into a time when the law was an eye for an eye and he said love your enemy. When the religious leaders were like Gods and he said humble yourselves. He wanted to be with the outcasts, he wanted to love them into wellness. A time when wisdom was like gold and he said be like children. He didn't just preach. He lived it out. 

I want to follow Jesus, not because I know for sure I'm right! I want to follow him because I want to understand love more deeply. I want to know why a man would die for strangers because he wanted to live out love so badly, he was willing to die for it. I want to know why the privilege of sacrifice leads to fulfilment in a mysterious, "we are all one" kind of way! 

I don't ever want you to be hurt in the name of what I believe! Because who I follow only wants to heal brokenness, to love others, to fix the hurt. 

Ultimately if you choose to still believe a true follower of Christ is just bad news. I will not get loud and angry. I will do what I am taught, directly from how Jesus modelled it. I will close my mouth, and I will attempt just simply, to love!

Hey!!!!!!!

Is for horses.....?

No I was trying to say hi...
It's been a long time. I haven't been blogging really, I don't even know what real blogging is. I just think a lot and decided maybe it would make sense to share my thoughts. lately I have been doing more video blog stuff so I will post those here how about?

I don't know if anyone reads this anymore but my video entitled "When the world shits on you, grow" is the first one I am posting. It came to me after some really difficult struggles. I realized that adversity can be fertilizer for growth. How bout that??

This second video was similar.. It's longer and unedited but I was thinking about growth again but in a slightly different way. After having reptiles when I was young I used to watch them shed their skin. While they were shedding they were very vulnerable and generally more volatile as well.. The two V's lol. Once they would finally rid themselves of that old skin their color was so bright and they were vibrant and active again.  This brought to mind a great analogy for growth in us silly humans and how sometimes we need to leave things behind to truly grow.. So enjoy! Love!

Shine your light like only you can!

A raw diamond before the jewel cutter does his thing

 We are all unique!!

What do you mean I didn't just blow your mind!? You mean you've been told this before?

Ah crap I thought I was onto something here........

Yes we have all been told we are special, unique. Sometimes by parents who say thank goodness there is only one of you. Sometimes we hear it so much that we shrug it off. Yeah so what I'm unique. what does that really mean?

It just kind of hit me today while driving and thinking. An analogy that I just had to share. I was thinking about how as Christians we are to shine God's light.  Matthew 5:16  In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven. 

Now that's all well and good. So we are unique and we are to shine God's light to glorify Him. Awesome. Then suddenly like a baseball bat with peanut butter on it, it hit me.

We are very much like diamonds! Shiny and sharp!

I know it sounds cute, like something on a hallmark card. But think about it. Diamonds don't initially look like what we see in the store. They are rough at first. Each one is unique, maybe a little raw but light still shines through them.. Let's say then that we are the diamonds and that the light that shines through us is God. If no single diamond is the same than neither then is the way the light shines through them.  In that way he wants to use our uniqueness.. Yes I promise you that being unique is not by any means a mistake on God's part. Even though sometimes the world wants to fashion us all into the same shape and have us all shine the same light. It tries to convince us to hate our uniqueness. We don't want to stand out. What an evil thing to convince someone that the physical, spiritual and mental shape they are is anything short of a miracle.

Just like diamonds that each channel light in a slightly different way we each do the same thing for God's light. So yes you are unique, nothing new there. But that uniqueness means you have a special perspective on God. A way to share him that no one has ever or will ever have again.

And that's just the beginning.  The journey ain't over for you there my rough diamond friends.

The other amazing thing is that once a diamond is found it is then taken by a Jewel cutter to be turned into an even more magnificent jewel. One that will show light in a way that nothing else can. It makes it more clear and yet still keeps it unique. Could we look at the jewel cutter as God.
Ephesians 2:10
For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Yes we are over our lives shaped and formed by God to then shine his light in the fullest way possible. With clarity and after the removal of all the dirt and dust the world puts on us. In the most unique way possible he wants us to shine. I looked into diamond cutting and learned a bit. For example;  The diamond cutting process includes these steps; planning, cleaving or sawing, bruting, polishing, and final inspection.

It's so amazing how sometimes God speaks through the simplest things. I looked at these steps and realized again it is very much what God does for us.

Planning;   Jeremiah 29:11  For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  God has put a lot of planning into each and every one of us. There is nothing that has happened or will happen to you that God has not taken into account.

Cleaving or sawing (Shaping); Jeremiah 18- 1: 6 This is the word that came to Jeremiah from the Lord:  “Go down to the potter’s house, and there I will give you my message.”  So I went down to the potter’s house, and I saw him working at the wheel.  But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him.

  Then the word of the Lord came to me.  He said, “Can I not do with you, Israel, as this potter does?” declares the Lord. “Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand, Israel. So yes God is talking about Isreal but how different is it for each and every one of us. God is the potter, the creator. He and only he is the one with the plans and because of that the only one who knows how to properly shape you. Sometimes in order to start to take shape things need to be stripped away from us. This can be painful and can cause us longing for the change to stop. Trust in God.

Bruting; Bruting was interesting. I had never heard of it before. It means continuing to shape the diamond but this time against another diamond. Like God uses us in fellowship with others to shape us more and more. There are some things we learn that can only be learned from others. We need to listen and always be willing to take advice, God may be shaping us further. In this way we are to serve one another to continue encouraging in each other this shaping by God.
Galatians 5:13  For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

Polishing; I couldn't immediately find a bible verse that directly talks about polishing but this one is pretty clear, no pun intended. God continues to bring forth the full brilliance of his light through us. He has made his cuts. Some of these being painful and scary and now he wants to make us even more clear and clean. He wants to make us as clear as possible to let as much of his pure light through unhindered by our own dirty surfaces ie: Pride, forgiveness, hate and all the things that inhibit his light.

Final inspection; Psalms 74:6-7  For not from the east or from the west  and not from the wilderness comes lifting up,  but it is God who executes judgment,  putting down one and lifting up another.

Once God has done all his work with us it is then when our life here on earth is finished that he will look at how we shined his light. He is the only one able to judge and knows what colors he intended to come through us. 

We can also be assured that we will not be left an unfinished jewel by our Father.

Philippians 1:6
being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Okay so this covered more than I intended. I just wanted to say we are unique and that we each shine God's light in a unique way, a way that God intended, a way we should be proud of, all your little idiosyncrasies, the things you may hate about yourself, these are all things God is working on, polishing, and reshaping so that you will shine the purist form of his light possible .  We are all crafted by the hands of God and he will shine his light on us. Through the unique ridges and cuts he has formed in us will come the revelation of God's light from unique angles.

A finished diamond now shining all the colors from the light spectrum

Waiting to be ready VS the reality… You were born ready!

I haven't been posting enough.. As per usual.. So lets get this party started...

How often have I said, I have goals, things I want to achieve, even maybe things God has called me to do but...... I'm not ready yet. Have you ever said that? Oh yes I would love to _________ But I'm just not quite ready. You can fill in the blank with something you feel you should do but don't because of not being ready.  

What are we really waiting for? Maybe to be comfortable, for fear to go away first..

Now if you're not ready to start your car because the keys aren't in the ignition yet, that's a logical need for readiness, and the solution is simple.. Put the keys in the ignition and then you are ready. But if the keys are in the ignition and you just aren't "feeling" ready to start the car because of fear..  That's the kind of "Not ready" I want to talk about and I think it's pretty common. It stops us from achieving some amazing things we are meant to achieve because we have fear, apprehensions and doubt. We justify not doing because we aren't feeling ready.

What does it really mean to be ready?

I Googled "being ready.", and what I found was very interesting indeed. One of the first hits was this..... Check it out and maybe Google it yourself.
 
Main entry:  COME
part of speech: verb 
definition: advance, approach
synonyms:  Appear, arrive, be accessible, be at disposal, be handy, be obtainable, BE READY....


I love the fact that when I Googled BE READY the word  COME came up. First it was crazy to me because I knew Jesus said this a lot.  Instantly I knew looking into this was linking me to things God wanted me to know. Already I had found out that BE READY was a synonym for COME. 

So it begins......

Could being ready to serve God have something to do with Jesus calling us?
But when Jesus calls us don't we have to choose whether we are ready or not?  Whether we are prepared because If we aren't prepared it could be VERY VERY scary!

Maybe? 

But maybe Jesus expects that when he says "COME." we will BE READY, be obtainable, be handy,  to quit making excuses, break free of fears and live out our faith. 

I can think of a bible story that seems to fit well with this.

Let's look at when Jesus Walked on the Water and told Peter to, "come." 

Matthew 14: 25-33

• ²⁵ Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. ²⁶ When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.
  ²⁷ But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
  ²⁸ “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
  ²⁹ “Come,” he said.
  Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. ³⁰ But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
  ³¹ Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
  ³² And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. ³³ Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

It's interesting to see that Peter in some ways was testing the situation by saying, “Lord, if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water.”. I also don't think that it's wrong for us to make sure it is Jesus before we follow. To literally say, "Lord if it is you tell me to come." might be a good practice to get into. But once we know it is Jesus and he tells us to come, are we really prepared for what that means or are we going to revert back to the old, "I'm not ready yet."

We can take a lot out of Peter's courage and I think we should be more like him, he wasn't being foolish, he was being obedient to Jesus. The other disciples were there as well and had the same opportunity to jump out of the boat, out of their comfort zones but they certainly weren't willing to do it. Peter had heard the call from his master and teacher, Jesus, and it was enough.

I want to be able to say that.. I heard the call from Jesus, and it was enough. 

It seems to me it wasn't about him being ready or not ready. When Jesus said come, he went. On rough water no less.. 

The story doesn't end with Jesus and peter dancing together on the water though. And maybe when we are obedient and follow Jesus the outcome will be similar. Note that Peter didn't shout to Jesus, "Lord, promise me I won't sink before I get out of the boat." That would maybe help some of us be a little more ready. A guarantee of success.. Maybe Peter wouldn't have liked Jesus' response. "No Peter, if you walk out to me, you will sink. You're faith isn't quite strong enough."

The story isn't about success or failure though. It is about faith and obedience. And because Peter had those things, look at his testimony and the strength that this moment between him and Jesus has built for generations of Christians.

So does this all mean when we follow Jesus we might sink, be afraid, fail?  Read again what happened to Peter.  
³⁰ But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”

So after taking the step of faith and obeying Jesus, he began to fear. I think we have all thought to ourselves, "What have I gotten myself into?" Probably going through Peter's mind at that moment.

Maybe fear is part of it? And maybe sinking is too? 

So the story didn't end with Peter and Jesus dancing the night away on the water but.. It didn't end with Peter drowning either.. I'm sure for a moment Peter thought he was done, felt desperate and stupid for getting out of the boat, but Jesus was right there.. Take comfort in that..  Follow Jesus when he says "Come." and don't worry about the outcome. Because even if fear over takes you, or a storm, or an angry person, or sickness.. ALL you need to do is cry out, “Lord, save me!” and like the verse goes on to say.
³¹ Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”

Immediately!!  Jesus didn't wait for a minute to teach Peter a lesson. The lesson had already taken place. Jesus is calling you, Jesus is also there, ready to pick you up.. JESUS HAS IT COVERED! All we need to do is obey. 

Do you have the faith to not worry whether you are ready or not? To just obey your master and teacher. If you do, I have a feeling you also better be ready to build an amazing testimony for Jesus!


Let's also remember that sinking and being picked up by Jesus glorifies him as well.

2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.


Even if we follow Jesus and sink we can say, "I stepped out in faith, I was weak, but Jesus was strong and I am still here. Despite the storm, the waves, because of his faithfulness to me, his love, his strength, I am here. Thank you Jesus!"

The real truth of the matter remains. Most Christians have no desire to walk on the water when there is a perfectly good boat anywhere nearby. But maybe.... Maybe I would if Jesus could promise me a successful, peaceful experience with no fear.. Until then I'm just not ready, until then I will stay in the safety of the boat.. 

WAKE UP!! Hear the call of Jesus on your life and answer that call! 

In Christ, we are BORN READY! 

and Remember
you aren't alone on the water.

Philippians 4:13
I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

LOVE MORE!!!

                How many of us would read this and be able to only love some of these neighbors?



Hi there,

So it's 3am and I guess I'm still someone who doesn't sleep normally. And I sure am still someone who probably thinks way too much. But That's me and maybe it's a good thing. Because I feel like some people don't think enough.

I wanted to write because I just saw something online that broke my heart. An old lady on a school bus being harassed by kids. You may have seen the youtube video. I know things like this happen every day. It seems that we care so much more when these things get caught on tape and we wonder how we can help this person. 

WE CAN HELP THESE PEOPLE! They are the people we see everyday that we judge. That we pass by and don't smile or say hi to. There will always be bullies. And we react to these videos by saying mean things about the kids or the ones who inflicted harm. I just think we are fighting fire with fire. I want to see people fight hate with love. Love your neighbor as yourself. See them for the beautiful unique beings they are! No one like them will ever EVER exist again. They need to be appreciated like a fine work of art.

I wrote a little poem/observational story about a guy who I used to watch clean up after people at Wendy's. I should have read this to him and maybe I still will. He was a light. Please be kind to each other. We are all valuable beyond measure.

I went to Wendy's for lunch.. Wendy's is not good for you (the food) but somethings at Wendy's are good for you..

There is a man at Wendy's his name is Ken.. I think Ken is the nicest man I have ever come across.. He is an old man, looks maybe sixty something. He has bright eyes, not old eyes..

Ken works at Wendy's cleaning up after people and handing out mints..

Every time he sees me he asks me the same question.. Maybe Ken is forgetful or maybe he likes my answer.. He always seems very interested either way.. He asks "What do you do?" I tell him "I make movies". He says "You can do that around here?" "yes", I say.. "But not very much". He pats me on the shoulder and looks excited at the prospect of movies being made in simple little New Brunswick.. "need any actors?" he asks jokingly.. He always talks about how we've acted in films together..

A part of me knows Ken is too simple and too humble to really care much about movies.

He smiles and walks over to another table with people I don't know.. I wonder if he asks them the same thing and I wonder what they answer. I see them smile and I know they like Ken too.. I wonder where he goes after he leaves Wendy's..

Ken cleans the tables with a smile, hands out mints and asks people what they do.. He's a servant, he's an old man and he's a child.. With a heart bigger than the sun and twice as warm.. He has more in his eyes than in his words and I am glad I went to Wendy's for lunch..

Please love each other. If you're reading this. Just take the time today to smile at someone who may need it or say hello to someone. You never know when that person might really need some light. Please don't judge. Not based on looks, personality, style or anything you don't understand. Ask yourself how you would want people to treat you.

We are all scared but we don't have to be alone.

Be thankful, happy, amazed!

 

Have you looked up lately?

I can't help but be amazed by the universe.. It's huge! I mean...... HUGE!!! I guess you could look at it and realize that the problems we let plague our days in comparison are sooo insignificant relative to it's size.. Or you could look at it and think how important or lucky we really are to even be alive.

As a bit of a reference to the size of our universe here's something interesting..Voyager 1 is a shuttle launched by NASA to study our solar system, it's also currently the fastest man made object. It travels at a staggering 17.07 km/s, or 61,452 kilometers per hour (38,185 mph). Yet even at this speed it will not reach the nearest star to our solar system (Alpha Centuri) for 134,433.2 years...

Think about that for a second.. That's the next closest star to our sun..

Based on current estimates, there are about 1,000 stars to every grain of sand on Earth!! There are an estimated 100 to 200 billion galaxies. So taking a conservative number of 100 billion stars per galaxy gives an approximate total of 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 stars. (Which is 10 sextillion)..

That should have blown your mind!!!Remember that we are talking about getting to the closest star which is roughly 4.3 light years away.. The universe itself or at least the region visible from Earth (the observable universe) is about 92 billion light years across.. And most theories about the nature of the universe agree that it is most likely expanding constantly at the speed of light.. Which means it truly could be infinite.

I know this is a lot of stats and probably most of you won't read all this but the point is we are but a spec, a tiny yet beautiful planet in this vast expanse that we call the universe.. We are the perfect distance from our sun for life.. We are more than lucky.. Life is a miracle. Take a deep breath and thank God for the gift of it all, most of which we can't even comprehend.

So if you are driving to work and you spill your coffee, please just look up at the sky and remember how small and lucky you are to exist at all..

What stinks!?

Ever wake up in the morning and wonder, What the heck is that smell?!

If you think I'm speaking of midnight toots I am not! I am speaking of what happens when water doesn't flow.. And no I am not talking about having to pee either. I am using a metaphor here ya goof!

Does your life look like, or smell like this?

When water gets trapped and can't flow it becomes stagnant. Define this word Joel!

Okay.

stag·nant/ˈstagnənt/

Adjective:

(of a body of water or the atmosphere of a confined space) Having no current or flow and often having an unpleasant smell as a consequence. Showing no activity; dull and sluggish: "a stagnant economy". Not advancing or developing.

So when you wake up in the morning and smell something, could it be something stagnant? Maybe you live next to a pond, or maybe the smell is coming from your life?

I know I've been waking up with some stinkyness lately. Probably for a few reasons, but mostly I haven't been flowing, moving, doing.... Yes I wake up and literally move and do things, but am I doing anything that I am "Called" to do? With out these things our lives begin to lack activity, become dull, sluggish. Not advancing or developing.

Do you think before water flows it decides whether it should flow or not? Luckily for water gravity just kind of takes over. Sometimes I think it would be good if gravity forced us to move as well. Does water worry about being successful in it's flowing? Whether it will flow to where it is meant to be? NO. It just flows when it has freedom to.

WE HAVE FREEDOM TO FLOW! WHY DO WE CHOOSE NOT TO?! WE WILL END UP STINKING IF WE DON'T!!

We don't even have to worry if we will flow properly to where we need to be. GOD has taken care of that. So why do we become stagnant?

FEAR????

Oh my my! I hate the word as I hate what it encompasses. It holds us back when we think it is protecting us. It is the master of all deception. A fun little acronym for fear, False Evidence Appearing Real. When we were cave men/women and ran away from a saber tooth tiger, that was good fear. When we don't try something because we might fail, don't say something because we might be wrong, sit at home instead of going out because something bad might happen, that is a bad kind of fear. Again it can lead to being a stinky dude or dudette! Who wants to be stinky?
When fear stops us from doing something we are called to do the deception has stopped us from bringing life to others and ourselves. Just like a river that stops flowing..

So where does the stink comes from?

I read a little about it online (also know about it because of my degree in stinkology) And it's because simply put, things in the water begin to die and decompose when the water doesn't flow. So stagnancy leads to death.. I don't mean if you don't move in your life you will die.. I mean if you don't move in your life you will feel less alive. Your life will suffer and it also won't lead to you bringing life to others. Your river will be all damned up.

We are meant to flow!

A river flows and brings life to all around it. Even most communities are built around a moving body of water. It is such a great symbol for a healthy life! And when a rock falls in a river and stops some of the flow, the river doesn't wait and think about what should be done or out of fear stop flowing. It flows around and sure enough it gets to where it needs to be.

That is so much like us in life. We get all fearful of whether we are going the right places or moving when we are supposed to. A rock falls in front of us and in stead of flowing around it we stop flowing all together. We start to stink and then inevitably we aren't bringing life to ourselves or others.

We have to trust in God! That when we flow God will take care of us getting to the dead trees and vegetation. That even if it feels like we aren't going where we are supposed to sometimes, God can use our water as long as it's flowing..

So my advice to you and to me and to the frogs and the monkeys.... WE NEED TO FLOW!!

Here's a new acronym for ya.. FLOW, Freely Living Optimistically Waiting..

Live freely and have hope that God will do with you what needs to be done.

Romans 8:28 NIV

²⁸ And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

So FLOW! (Freely Live Optimistically waiting). Don't let FEAR (false evidence appearing real) stop you from bringing life to others or living what you are called to do! The last thing we want to be is stinky lifeless people right?

This is the picture of what your life could look like..

Light through glass

Ever been inspired?

I love the sound of water, birds in the spring, the breathing of a person I care about.
I love summer grass when it's a little too long, the bark on an old tree, a narrow root ridden path in the middle of the woods.

Ever just feel love like it's a blanket? It covers you and then you feel like everything is going to be okay... Even at 5am.. Even when nothing around you is perfect. I've been feeling very ill the past week or so.. After many amazing accomplishments. This tends to happen to me. Right now though I just feel like it all makes sense, in a muddy water kind of way. eerrrr?

Why am I up so late? Because I feel love and I needed to write about it. Love.. Even the hateful are surprised by it hitting them in the face. It's powerful. I need sleep but, what could be more important. I have to write about it now.

love as defined by Wikipedia;
Love is an emotion of a strong affection and personal attachment. love is also a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection; and "the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another". Love may also be described as actions towards others or oneself based on compassion, or as actions towards others based on affection.

love as defined by the bible;
1 Corinthians 13
If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. ³ If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.

⁴ Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud ⁵ or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. ⁶ It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. ⁷ Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Can it be argued that love isn't the pinnacle of human emotion and quite possibly also the core of what it means to be human. Let it fill you up and flow through you. inspire you to do, not only for others but for yourself, beyond what is deserved or expected. Wake up to the gift of life and don't take it for granted. Stop looking at the world around you like it's a normal every day occurrence but a miracle that we can barely grasp. LOVE. Don't try to contain it, share it. Love contained is like a cure withheld. Don't love less but more. Love through smiles, hugs, hand shakes, gifts, listening, patience, kindness, goodness, forgiveness, being. These are ways of showing love. And if you're empty of love ask God for more. Try it.

I guess I was just inspired and needed to post this. To encourage. You can't love too much but you can always love too little.

It flows freely through birds who sing it

flowers who spring it

children who bring it

though hate can try, undone to make

unrest of soul, the heart won't break

through the birds

through flowers

through children

through the very air we breath

exhale is all it takes

through you it lives

Give the eyes away... The eyes...

So I felt the need to write... just had some brain monkeys that needed out. Brains been pretty much on overdrive lately. So many ideas and thoughts jumping around, which I love. With this poem I am trying to express the search for truth. I don't want to say too much because I think it's important people get what they want out of it. Feel free to post about the poem below what you feel it means or ask me questions about it.. Alabaster sandwich.



anyway it's late again I need to sleep and dream of strange adventures..

here it is.. wammo



The faintest light shines, though confined
the image forms through hours combined
with shaking, waking, sometimes warm
sometimes cold or night or storm
illuminating shadows, shapes
the cycle loves, it's masks, it's hates
so breathe intent to take the eyes
break and build, cycle's despise
the foolish voice, such easy prey
the fools all gather, the worlds display
But foolish only fools the flesh
the soul and spirit with truth confess
life will grow from dust, a tree
the lost, the hurt, will be set free
from winds a whisper all will hear
the faintest light will make things clear

ALERT..ALERT..NEW VIDEO!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey yall, I stayed up late while my video uploaded.. YAWN.. It's a new one with me and my sis Leah discussing things. We talk about the importance of creativity and some other various things. As of late I have been on a creative role so I encourage everyone else to do the same.

I need to sleep but I'm glad I finished it so here it is!! YAY

new painting....And thoughts...

Hi ya'll.. Being creative keeps my veins pumping.. Lately I've been able to create again and I want to keep the momentum going. BE CREATIVE!!! It brings life!! If you have an idea for a painting just start it, or anything for that matter, carve soap if you have to! Finish it! Who cares what it looks like. But be patient with yourself.. Patience is a gift from God. So is creativity. Join the two and the skies the limit! BAM!!

Who's a donkey? and purpose?

It's taken me a little longer to finally post this so I apologize.. Here it FINALLY is...

The last so many months lots has happened! Good bad and ugly. (Little movie reference there). Last year when I started writing this blog I was making some big changes in my life, trying to make the move from a mediocre life to a life with true purpose and fulfillment. How you may ask could one make such changes? Well that's a really big and crazy question that I don't think I can answer while writing this blog, just trying to be honest. But I will attempt to throw it at you in a somewhat honest way.

Here goes something....

I kind of want to be willing to die for something....... hmmm. That just kinda came out.. I read it back and it's kind of scary too.. Do I mean it? Maybe? Whether I would actually do it or not is a different story but I think, or feel, that to live with true purpose a person must have that... A purpose to live, something to fight for... A true challenge on your life itself...

How does being willing to die for something have anything to do with that?

I want to be so devoted to something that it means more than life itself.. Ever seen the movie Braveheart? It's an awesome movie, it also touches on this subject, Mel Gibson playing William Wallace is quoted saying, "Every man dies, not every man really lives." So to die is inevitable right? We all die.. It's not really that scary, what is scary is dieing with out ever really living.. Your life is your one chance to impact the world. So don't be afraid of dying, be afraid of not living.

If you have seen Braveheart (spoiler here) you know that William Wallace dies at the end but he dies knowing that he has fought for the freedom of his people. He was willing to die to obtain that goal because it was so important! I'm not saying I want to be a martyr either or that we should want that. I want to live, but I know there are some things that may be more important than life itself... A bigger picture that I affect but that has nothing to do with me.

I started a house church, okay so that's something I want to write a blog about and start sharing more, right now though I just wanted to say that we were talking about faith today and Corrie Ten Boom came up. She wrote a book called the hiding place and was a holocaust survivor. The book is amazing and in it she talks about her sister Betsie. Her sister is such an amazing example of faith. Faith in God. I want to post a video of Corrie Ten Boom for people to listen to because it is sooo inspiring..



The amazing thing about Betsie is that she fully trusted God. She had faith. She was suffering in a concentration camp and eventually would die there, but her purpose did not end with her death. We were talking today about how she must have had no idea that a guy named Joel Thompson in Fredericton NB would have had his life changed by her story. Not to mention the millions of others who could say the same. So that's what I'm talking about when I say a bigger picture. I really recommend you read the hiding place. The stories of Betsie's faith will shake you up!

a little quote from Corrie Ten Boom on faith..
"Faith is like radar that sees through the fog-the reality of things at a distance that the human eye cannot see."

Okay so back to life with purpose through faith...

Ever seen a donkey following a carrot? In order to get the donkey to go forward it is tempted with something it wants right in front of it. Unfortunately no matter how much the donkey walks it won't end up getting the carrot.. It just walks and walks and walks. It could be walking by a bunch of carrots but the one right in front of it has it so focused it misses so many things. It blinds it to what may be all around it. What it may really need.

hmmmmm..

I think in some ways many of us end up living lives just like this donkey. With out true purpose, we are so caught up chasing things, trying to obtain the things that are easy, right in front of us but things that may never be fulfilling (Money, power, social status, job status, carrots. THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX, STOP CHASING THE CARROT!! Challenge yourself to pursue something that means everything to you. Something more risky than chasing a carrot. Then have faith because you're gonna need it!

It can be scary to stop chasing the carrot because then we start seeing everything in front of us, to the sides of us. It can be overwhelming. We don't see the carrot so we don't see there is immediate gratification. That's where faith comes in..

Hebrews 11:1 says;
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Do not see? But confidence, hope and assurance.. We may not always see right in front of us exactly what we think we need and want but with faith we can be assured that God is providing those things. We can trust and be at peace, have confidence that if we need a carrot God will give it to us.. Not just dangle it in front of us at a safe distance to keep us moving. We choose to move on our own and have faith God will provide..

Okay so I think some of this has made a little sense.. I'm going to call my blogs free thought blogs lol.. I don't pre plan any of this just write whats on my mind..

So with someone like Betsie Ten Boom if she just focused on what was right in front of her she might have thought, oh no I could die here, my life could end. If she had done that she would have been so down about her situation she wouldn't have said all of the amazing things that inspired Corrie which then ended up in the book which then changed so many lives.. But she had something bigger than life to focus on, a trust in a God who had a plan. A purpose that has continued on long after her death. Imagine if we all had her faith.. Faith to not just take the safe path, to stay joyful when our lives may not be going as planned, to truly live despite our circumstance. I guess that's what I want and I know it's a journey that takes a relationship with God. A God bigger than death. To have faith in a purpose that is his so it too, will live on after I'm gone.

Stuffs

Hi every people.

Okay....

So....

I realize I haven't posted in 80 years but I really want to start posting frequently again. As per usual lots of things are going on in life. Lot's of awesome changes! There have been some negatives but I know they are all still leading to a greater purpose. Yes I believe that!

I am not going to post anything long right now but tomorrow I will post with more detail. Just want to get the ball rolling. So YEAH!!!

Brain dance

Just wrote a little tiddly poem and thought I would share. Sometimes we complicate things and that is quite a simple fact.

It's simple to be simple

just think of simple thoughts

jumping frogs, hollow logs

and playing drums on pots

But beware of the thinking

and sinking down a lot

when thinking about thinking

the mind can still get caught

in complicated twists and turns

like knots and rolling rocks

for example....

the number nine or yesterday

the way the world turns and sways

why people smile and then they frown

why what goes up must come down

the stars and how they shine so bright

what gives us taste?

what gives us sight?

when I die what will I wear?

what if i am attacked by a.... wolf?

....................

it's simple to be simple

of that I am quite sure

Just beware of thinking

and not thinking some more

Pass the hurt?

Happy Friday to y'all. Hope none of you get hit by a satellite falling out of the sky today! If you don't know what I'm talking about, NASA has warned the world that one of their satellites will be falling back to earth shortly.. But don't worry your odds of getting hit by it are the same as hitting a hole in one.. If you're a bad golfer you're safe!

So what is this blog about? Satellites falling? Actually no that was just a random thought. I'm actually writing about hurt.. How many of us are guilty of passing the hurt? I know I am.. What is passing the hurt? You might ask with a knowing grin on your beautiful face. Well it's a little game we as humans like to play.

Has anyone ever hurt you? Said something mean? Done something to you they shouldn't have? Made you feel like the world wasn't such an amazing place? Maybe even made you feel like the world was a down right awful place? Yes I think it's safe to say we have all been hurt.
So what is our reaction to being hurt?
Well It would seem our instinctual reaction is we put up walls. Go into defense mode. We don't want to be hurt because it doesn't feel good so we look for ways to protect ourselves. They say sometimes the best defense is a good offense so some people begin to hurt others in an attempt to not be hurt themselves. No one is going to go near a snake that constantly bites. The snake might be lonely but chances are no one will ever get close enough to hurt him. Good strategy?

Someone says you're stupid and you say.. No I'm not you are!! Think about it..

So we pass the hurt. We pass it to children, friends, family or anyone in our way. They in turn pass the hurt to someone new. Not because we want to hurt others. No, I don't think anyone wants another person to hurt. In our simple little human minds we think we are protecting ourselves.

HURT CAN BE RESOLVED! But sadly It rarely is. We live in a world of hurt people. They in turn become lost because they live in a cycle of hurting others and then guess what? The defenses fail and the person still gets hurt. To resolve the hurt we must begin by looking at why fighting fire with fire doesn't work.. MORE FIRE!!

It may seem like it's human nature to hold grudges, to build walls and to pass the hurt but I think sometimes saying something is human nature is just an excuse. An excuse to take the easy road. We define our nature by our actions. Break the cycle of hurt! It begins with forgiveness.

Corrie Ten Boom, a Christian woman who survived a Nazi concentration camp during the Holocaust, said, "Forgiveness is to set a prisoner free, and to realize the prisoner was you."

hmmmmm..... Really think about that... The prisoner was you? Could it be that our "Human nature" is actually hurting us more? Holding us captive? ABSOLUTELY! This is one of the truths that when you realize it, it really sets you free..

So look at your past. The things that have hurt you.. Start letting those things go and see how it feels, forgive the people who you feel have hurt you. It's scary at first because you think you are making yourself vulnerable but guess what, it doesn't make you any more vulnerable at all! Start fighting fire with water. If someone hurts you, love them in return.

Jesus said,

“But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also” Matthew 5:39

Jesus in his infinite wisdom was commanding us to do something we don't completely understand. It seems he is telling us to let people hurt us. Simply looked at it may appear that way but we also have to rememeber Jesus had knowledge of the big picture. Maybe it was more about love. Saying to the person, "I know you don't want to hurt me, I will not retaliate, I love you." Eventually love causes people to drop their defenses because their fear of being hurt starts to disappear.

Passing the hurt will never get us anywhere but it may, in the beginning, feel like we are protecting ourselves. The only true way to stop the world from hurting is to love and forgive each other. Try it, it will surprise you.

Start passing the love. It may take time to break down defenses but eventually they will fall and you will see the world through different eyes.

A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle

Hitting the snooze button

bzzzzzzzzzzzzz... bzzzzzzzzzzzzzz - that's the sound of an alarm clock (Metaphor for a calling on someones life) to wake up and answer that calling. And I say,
"Okay Okay!! I know I know I need to wake up buuuutt I'll just hit the snooze button once.."

bzzzzzzzzz bzzzzzzzzzzzz...
"Oh right I was supposed to wake up.. Oh well hitting the snooze button one more time won't hurt..."

BZZZZZZZZ BZZZZZZZZZ
"Okay okay this time I'll get up!"

How many freaken wake up calls does a person need before they actually truly wake up??
The answer for me seems to always be just one more. I realize I need to wake up and then I do but then quickly decide that just hitting the snooze button one more time couldn't hurt. I'm talking in metaphors here. I'm referring to waking up to your life, to the things you may be doing that cause you pain. To the things you may not be doing that would cause you joy. Waking up and living the life calling to you. Beckoning you to become fulfilled and empowered.

Not waking up seems kind of insane.

My good buddy Albert Einstein defines Insanity thusly: "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

Let's think about the things we as humans do over and over again.

We look for happiness in money or power so some people work endlessly expecting that the emptiness that they feel when it comes to work or life will be filled by the money they make. Inevitably power in work and money from slaving endless hours will just be a fix. You will get hungry again and you'll start eating anything you can find.. It just leads you into a cycle.

How about someone addicted to a drug or alcohol or any crutch really? Sometimes the need is to dull an emotion, forget or ignore things or just feel momentarily better.. Then, you crash and feel like garbage but that's okay because you can just start the whole thing again right? insane cycle?

Maybe you look to other people to fix things, using someone physically or emotionally to make you feel fulfilled? Needed? Important? But then people let you down, you feel crappy again but that is also okay because there are lot's of new people to turn to. Insane cycle not getting anywhere really. spinning the tires.

Going around in circles looking for happiness, fulfillment, purpose. Reminds me of something...

A hamster running in a wheel not getting anywhere but continually running because maybe just maybe it feels like he is getting somewhere when he really truly undoubtedly is not going to get anywhere..

How many of us do that? I have been doing it so much lately it's not funny.. Okay well maybe a little funny hahah. Actually someone I heard speak lately, Steve Backlund, said it's good sometimes to say "let's just laugh about that." and actually just laugh about it in order to be able to not let little things bother us. Look him up on youtube, he's a great guy.

Maybe you are perfect and are always on the right path not using any crutches and taking complete responsibility for you and looking only to truth to make you happy. If that's you then congrats and can you teach me? That's not me though and Let me talk to you about my recent wake up calls.

Wake up call #1. Drinking is something I have been trying to take control over for a while. I've been in denial and I've known it wasn't good for me but I just kept running in that wheel. So one night I'm out on the town with some friends. I have way to much to drink, like I did almost every single time I drank, and don't remember much. Oh, what I do remember is a bit of an ambulance ride and then being at the hospital. Turns out someone had assaulted me. One of my eyes wouldn't open and when I forced it to I had double vision. I don't want to make this a long drawn out story so lets just say I ended up with three broken bones in my face. I now have a hole from my sinuses to my right eye socket. When I blow my nose my eye moves.. eek..

This happened and I said.. No more running in the alcohol wheel. It's hurting me in many ways.
but guess what?? again I hit the snooze button. Even after a broken face. WAKE UP JOEL!

Wake up call # 2.
So here I am writing yet another blog from my bed (Although today was a much better day) what am I on about? I have pneumonia. So another thing I have never been very good at is taking care of myself.. I think many of us suffer from that and we have this idea that we are invincible. Others might get sick but we never will. I GOT SICK!! running in that wheel of not taking care of myself.

Those are just the two latest wake up calls.. There have been many...

Making the same choices and expecting a different outcome.. Oh Albert my boy you truly were a genius!

So here I am.. The alarm has gone off yet again and I have not hit the snooze button yet. I pray that I have the strength not to hit it at all..

So how do we get off our hamster wheels? Just that, get out of the wheel. We all have wheels and I'm sure if we think hard enough we know what they are. I am going to quote Steve Backlund again here..

"Everything in our lives that doesn't glisten with hope is based on a lie." Think about that!

When we run in a wheel and we feel hopeless it's because we aren't basing things in our lives on the truth. We are in denial. It's scary to face yourself and to face your wheels. Chances are even though they eventually make you feel bad at the time they are in some ways comforting. Things like money, power, clothes, cars, lots of "friends", getting drunk/high/shutting off your brain in some way. These fixes all put you right back in the wheel. What gets you out of the wheel?

TRUTH, LOVE, ACCEPTANCE, SIMPLICITY, PROPER REST/DIET, TRUE FRIENDS, FAMILY, PEACE.... So much much much more. If it gives you hope then it probably isn't putting you in a wheel. Not hope that if only you could change who you are or your circumstances but real hope for who you are RIGHT NOW.. Negative thinking needs to stop and positive thinking needs to take over.

Everyone needs a wake up call and depending on how insane you are you may need quite a few wake up calls but you know you have wheels in your life that you are running in, well let this be your wake up call!! Stop running in the wheel! Start focusing on truth. The true things that can and will make you happy.

If you are like me you get discouraged easy. If you aren't like me you then keep doing what you're doing. But don't let discouragement put you back in the wheel either.. That would be a lie.

Pursue your dreams! Breath the air! Give someone a hug! Be the shiny you that God created.

Smile! but please don't wait for the next alarm. You never know when there won't be a next..

WAKE UP!!

Our greatest resource, the key to heaven?

The date this was finished was actually Sept. 16th

Try to look at this child and not smile!

So I started writing this blog like a month ago and put it off for a while. Not really sure why. Now I'm sick with pneumonia and I've been laying in bed for almost a week now watching tv and inevitably thinking a lot. But I'm going to attempt right now to finish it. So hold onto your horses peeps cause I am slightly feverish.

Okay.... sooooo.. This is a BIG one. I want to try to tackle this well but it's going to be tough because I think it's a HUGE thing. it's also really important to me. I'm going to give it a shot though because it's been on my mind for a while and it's something that is really important to me.

One of the things we struggle with as people when it comes to happiness, or the lack of it, is ourselves. Makes things difficult because well, the one thing you will always have the rest of your life is you. When you were a kid do you remember that? Do you remember the weight on your shoulders being that heavy? What do you mean you didn't think about it?

Can you remember when life started to get a bit harder? When you started to grow up and think the world wasn't such an amazing place. That people suffer, hate, lie. What changed from being a child? Children can still suffer and lie so does getting old just go hand in hand with more suffering? What do kids have that we don't?

Maybe trust? acceptance? Innocence?

What the heck am I getting at with this?????

CHILDREN.. Our greatest resource and the key to heaven is CHILDREN and this can be seen metaphorically, literally or palatorically (I made that word up)! This whole blog and it's focus is to try to explain what I know to be true but also explore what Jesus said about children. Key word being Try.. Might have to read between the lines on this one cause my heads pretty loopy.

I can not stress enough how amazing children are and let me tell you Jesus constantly stressed the importance of children. I'm going to quote a few bible verses where Jesus talked about children but I'm sure there are more. I could also talk about so many experiences in my own life where kids have helped me and things I've learned.

Mark 10:13-16
People were bringing little children to Jesus to have Him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." And He took the children in His arms, put His hands on them and blessed them.

So Jesus was Indignant. He was really upset that the disciples were hindering the children. Then he went on to say that if we can't be like kids we won't receive the kingdom of heaven. We need to be like them. What does that mean? Maybe that we too need to trust? Have faith? Acceptance? Innocence? Enjoy life for what it is.. Could kids in their simplicity understand something that we as adults and our more mature minds can not grasp?

No way! All concepts are easier understood as we become more "Intelligent". lol I'm talking to myself now! uh ohhhh...

I used to pray a lot that I would gain more knowledge and wisdom. As I aged I guess I figured I should know more and more so I could understand everything and have nothing to fear, I didn't like fear. Strangely the more I have done that the more I have feared. Something wasn't working. It's like chasing a fix. No matter how much you know and learn, you only end up opening a new door to confusion, a new can of worms. I believe it's an endless cycle. How do you break that?

Have you ever looked at a kid running around playing, laughing, not a care in the world and thought, "That child needs to know more." Of course not! But maybe you wished you could be like that? I think we can. I truly truly do. And I believe we are supposed to be.

Just so people know I quickly want to say I don't think knowledge is bad although I suppose it seems like I do lol. What I am saying about knowledge is if we make it our goal to know in an attempt to enjoy or we will run the risk of loosing sight of the simple basic truths. Butterflies are pretty, marshmallows are fun to eat, clowns are scary (little personal one there lol).

I have now started to pray that I need to know less and learn to trust more. Not that I know less.. That I need to know less..I want to loose the NEED to know everything in order to not fear. That I don't feel I need to know everything. That I can trust.. Look at the beauty all around me and frolic in a field of daisies. Return to innocence (Awesome song from the 90s).

I realize adults can't be kids. There is responsibility and knowledge that we need to gain as we grow but... Strive to be like a child.. It could be good. It could be GREAT.. Laugh for no reason. Eat something that you probably shouldn't lol.. Fever talking maybe?

I think as adults we begin to kind of poison ourselves and our conscience. Entertainment, money, power, we take in garbage. We think we need it. We can easily get lost. Probably why being like kids is also the key to heaven.

I guess..

We just need to loose the idea that as we age we need to be less trusting and less child like. not trusting hurts us.. Even though we feel like we will get hurt by trusting. Truth is we could get hurt either way. Protect yourself with in reason but.. Don't live in a brick wall a child would never understand. Gauge your wall based on that maybe? Let go a little too.

Speaking of hurt. Don't get me started on how wrong it is to hurt a child. Jesus talked about that too.

Mark 9:42 "And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck.

Jesus wasn't putting that lightly at all! Children need love and guidance!

Jesus also said treating a child well is treating him well..

Mark 9:35-37
Sitting down, Jesus called the twelve and said, "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all." He took a little child and had him stand among them. Taking him in His arms, He said to them, "Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me."

I think we need to treat children amazingly. Raise them knowing they are the future, they are God's gift and help teach us his truths. Beware of causing a child to become untrustworthy or sad. Kids eat up encouragement like a hungry shark!! I encourage you to encourage some children you know!

Then after you've done that take some lessons from those children. Think less.. Trust more.. This in turn will cause you to worry less, enjoy more, laugh and dance more!! Start believing in Santa Clause again if you have to! We are all children in God's eyes! :)

I want to leave you with a few quotes I found about children that I think ring true. I realize this has been my most disorganized blog but hey I'm running a fever and it's a really hard topic to tackle. I should probably return to it when my brain isn't boiling and in more detail because I barely scratched the surface.

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. ~William Stafford

Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man. ~Rabindranath Tagore

Children are one third of our population and all of our future. ~Select Panel for the Promotion of Child Health, 1981

While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about.
~Angela Schwindt

My mind and I

I haven't written for a while and man my head is about to explode! Man oh man oh peter pan!

So I've been doing some fun stuff the last few days/weeks, and things that have been really good for me. I've been trying to stay on track (not drink, sleep well, stay close to God) but let me tell you, it ain't been easy dude! And fail is a word that comes to mind right about now.

I don't have an issue with drinking or people who drink so let me say that first. What I have an issue with is if drinking is destroying someones life or areas in their life. If drinking is a crutch, something you use to not have to face things or just straight up makes you feel like poop then you got to kick that to the curb (I've been trying and doing pretty well). But I fail there too.

Why? y? wigh?

I notice that Joel sometimes doesn't like Joel, that is to say I can't stand myself sometimes. The way I think, the places my mind goes. I get frustrated or down, I want to be the best person I can be. To be kind and loving and accepting to all people and when I fail I get mad at me. When I was drinking I got a break from Joel every once in a while (okay more like 3 or 4 times a week) and to be honest it helped me deal with me, my failings, but in reality that is no way to deal.

Since I have been drinking less my mind and I have been hanging out much much more. I know we will learn to like each other one day, even admire each other but right now or after a bad freaken day I just want a break. That is what I want.

Sometimes what we want is not what we need..

What do I think I need? I need to like who I am, my thoughts, my rights and my wrongs and live with sometimes the bad things, learn from the bad things. I need to learn to live with out escape so that I can truly help others. Truly be me with no me missing.

Failure sucks, or does it? The bible says....

Hebrews 4:14-16
Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

So Jesus was tempted with the same stuff we are tempted with, he get's it man. Think of how much he probably wanted to run away from who he was. What he knew he would eventually have to do. Man he probably wanted to get drunk A LOT! maybe even thought about getting drunk before facing the cross. But he had a mission of love to carry out and he needed to be present for it.
We all have a purpose and I think we should be present for it too. It could be amazing.

We aren't alone in our battle with ourselves, we have God and other people because as humans we really are all on the same team

We all have demons to face and they come in many shapes and forms. It can sometimes seem easier to not face them at all. To run run run.. It's when we stop, turn around and face them that we can once and for all defeat them. I think the demons in our lives love it when we drink to ignore them. They love to be ignored because it means we aren't actually going to do anything about them.. Man they get scared when we stop running! Having friends to talk to about things helps too. Friends understand, people understand. And let me reiterate again how hard this has been for me.. BUT

Should I also just run from the things in life that are difficult?

"Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty... I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life. I have envied a great many people who led diffcult lives and led them well."
-- Theodore Roosevelt

Why would he have envied people who had difficult lives and lived them well? Why wouldn't he want to have an easy life?

Maybe there is a hidden secret in overcoming difficulty. Maybe it is in those times (when we actually face those things) that we gain true victory in our lives. We find ourselves and we begin to see what we are here for. To love, to inspire, to fight for truth and not take this precious thing we call life for granted.

It's going to be hard! But it's going to be worth it.

Thank you God for my struggles and the ability to face and overcome them so I can truly appreciate what it is to live!